So, when is this “peace on earth” thing starting? If you think I’m a little war-weary, you’d be right. I’ve been noticing lately how many wars are going on out there, and I don’t necessarily mean of the traditional, armed conflict variety.

To wit:
“War on Terrorism.”  This has been going on for a while now and no one can agree whether we are winning.

“War on Drugs.” We know how well that’s going.

“War on the Middle Class.” Lou Dobb’s favorite, second only to the “War on Illegal Immigration.”

“War on Christmas.”  Waged by those evil retailers who don’t show sufficient enthusiasm for Christian Consumerism.  After all, greed and over-consumption in the name of religion is what makes America great, right? And let’s not forget those nasty folk who complain about state-sponsored Christmas displays on public property.

“War on Christianity.” Waged by secularists and Other Religions who just haven’t accepted Christianity’s self-evident superiority.

“War on Science.” We’ve seen how much the Republican party values science over the past 8 years.

“War on Poverty.”  That’s been going exceptionally well for the last 40 years, right?

“War on Global Warming.” Global warming? We can’t declare war on that because the last 150 years of industrialization, carbon-fuel burning, and habitat destruction have had no impact on the environment.

…and on and on it goes.

For the most part these are real issues, although the “War on the Middle Class” is mostly Lou Dobbs’ faux populist attempt to get higher ratings from people who don’t bother to watch his show. The Wars on Christmas and Christianity exist only in the imaginations of those whose religious arrogance leads them to believe that those who don’t show sufficient enthusiasm or acceptance of their practices are victimizing them.

May I suggest some new wars we should consider declaring? How about wars on anti-intellectualism, narrow-mindedness and bigotry? Actually, that might be covered by just one “War on Ignorance.” Or how about a “War on Intolerance?”  Or a “War on Religious Homogeneity?”  Sign me up. Those are wars I can believe in.

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