Disclaimer: The word “happy” is not intended to define or be limited to a specific mood state, attitude or set of cognitions.

Use of the term “holidays” does not endorse nor imply the accuracy or inclusion of all possible holidays, whether they be legal, religious, both, or neither.

Further, use of the term “holidays” is not intended to encompass all the various opinions and/or dogmas set forth in civil and religious treatises concerning the proper usage of terms or customs that all possible holidays denote.

The term “all” does not imply a “war on Christmas,” a “battle against Hanukkah,” a “disrespect for Winter Solstice celebrations of ancient Pagan cultures such as naked Druids drinking fluids,” a “disregard for Kwanzaa,” nor a lack of interest in Festivus.

Use of the phrase” Happy Holidays” reflects only the personal view of The Skipper, who enthusiastically embraces all religious and legal customs that allow him to get away from work for a week.

In no case shall this statement be regarded as anything but the opinion or endorsement of The Skipper, the Admiral,  Dylan the Side of the Road Rescue Dog, or Tucker the Crazy Ass Relatives Rescue Dog.

Those individuals who wish to take issue with the good wishes expressed above are advised to contact The Skipper’s legal representative, Frederick Kissmyass, Esq.